My Little Demons

Living in a new city and state have been a real challenge to me. I have my good days and my really bad days. The hardest part is that our families are not here or my very best friends. I also don't have a job and finding one has been a true challenge. My kids are in school all day and I work out and find a few things to do, but soon enough I find myself going a little crazy with worry and uncertainty.

On Wednesday ( which I believe was a full moon) I cried and cried that day. I was even at the gym on the treadmill running and the tears just started to flow. I was wishing for my old life back....my family, my friends, and my teaching job.

I know that when we decided to take on this adventure it was going to be hard, but now that I am living it, I just can't believe how lonely I am somedays. I am greatful for the evenings because I have my husband and kids around me.

I am a very social person and have been doing a lot of different things so I can meet people and hope this very strange place feels more like home.

I know that in time it will get better and I have met some really great neighbors who have invited me to a Girls Night Out. I am looking forward to laughter and creating new friendships.

No more sad posts....sometimes I feel bad venting this to my family and best friends at home...they probally get sick of me talking about the same old stuff.

Cheers to a great weekend and the DVR that awaits me. :)

Where Oh Where Have I Been

I again am such a slacker....I said I was going to be blogging again and I quit.



Well...I have been going through some things and I know that my posts would of been depressing and repetitive or reporting the same ole thing. So, I will get everyone caught up and let you know where I ended up! Here it goes....

We sold our house in Wisconsin in July. I made a mad dash to Minnesota to find a house that we could move into by the end of August. That was so hard because the moving part was such a killer for me. It was such a hard decision and if I think about it today...I still get sad and emotional.

• This is the new house...I am working hard to make it my home.

I didn't find a job and that has been a struggle for me, because teaching is one of my passions and not to have a classroom for the first time in 16 years has been very emotional for me. I have spent many nights waking up in panic attacks and tears. I am trying very hard to get in somewhere and somehow...I am volunteering at my daughter's elementary school and trying to network as much as possible. Because I really want to have a classroom once again.

I've joined the Y because I am such a work out nut that I know that would be a great place for me to meet people. I am still running and am training to run the Monster Dash here in the Twin Cities of Minnesota.

The kids are all involved in sports and meeting many new friends.

I am greatful for nice neighbors that invited us to come to a bonfire and game day for the kids. I am believing that this is the right neighborhood for us.

More to come and some catching up to do for me!!

A Wish RIght Now...a Wish Right Now

Job hunting really sucks. I have applied for multiple teaching jobs in the Twin Cities area of Minnesota and I've heard nothing. I've emailed principals and even the hiring administrator. What else do I need to do to say....Hey I want an interview.

Sometimes I wake up at night in a sweat just thinking about the day I turned in my letter of resignation to my administrator. I was so sick (mentally that is) to do it. I was shaking. That was a very hard thing to do.

That teaching position I had was 16 years of my life. I have known some of my co-workers that long. Just today I received a wonderful card that just made me start crying. The words she wrote were so nice, I couldn't help but cry. To say she will miss my zest for life and my smile and my funny stories. Damn!!!

Just wondering if the interview team looks at my resume and thinks I am over the hill and wouldn't make a great fit. I just wish there is something else I could do? Or if there is, does someone have a grand idea for me?

Let's Talk Books

Summer is my most favorite time to read. I have more time to do it and I just love soaking up some sun on the patio when I do it. I just finished reading Heart of the Matter by Emily Giffin. I really liked the book. It was easy to read and I've read all of her books so far. I also wanted to start the series by Janet Evanovich...One for the Money and so on. I only read the first one, so I have a lot to catch up on.

However, there is one book that has intrigued me and it is called The Lovely Bones. I am so scared to start reading it? Anyone else read it? What do you all think?

Or anyone have any other suggestions? I am heading to the library this morning after I spend a more money at the eye doctor. I learned my lesson this year and will put that money in a Flex account for next year. I think I dropped a total of 700.00 on stuff between my daughters and me. Insurance doesn't cover a whole lot. So the exams, contacts, and glasses all add up. Yikes!!

What A Message

Saw this on a FB post this morning and just had to share.

It Seems Like Forever

I can't believe it has been over 3 months since I last posted on this blog.

I really want to get back into the blog world again. I finally feel like I have the time to do it.

I am probally going to change my title...still in the thinking phase of it all.

In a nutshell for the last 3 months this has been my life.

• Husband lives in Minneapolis and I live in Wisconsin. He commutes here on the weekends.
• Our house is up for sale and has been since March. Wish it would just sell. I really am trying to be patient.
• I resigned my teaching job that I had for 16 years. I was a serious basket case for a while. I still am numb and feel like I am in mourning.
• Cleaning out a classroom you've had for that long was a lot of work. I filled up the third stall of our garage. (Hubby thinks I am a hoarder..honey you just need a lot of things to teach young kids)
• I've applied for many teaching positions in the Minneapolis area....still waiting for that phone call for an interview. But with my years of experience, I am way too expensive and not desirable for school districts that have a budget crisis. I just wish I could tell them that I will work for a lower pay...I just want a job.
• Trying to enjoy my time off, but it gets awful lonely when hubby is gone and the kids are always doing things with their friends.
• I am still a work out nut job and completed my second half marathon in May. I ran a race last weekend and am still thinking about doing the Trek triathlon in 2 weeks.
• I am going to check in on your blogs and see what you have been up too and I am even going to give this blog some TLC and post photos and other things.

So cheers to feeling like I am back in it and trying to get back to my old self!!!

Feeling Buried

I am alive!! I can't believe how long it has been since I've posted. My life has been very busy these days.

• Relocation...relocation...relocation!!! Hubby has moved to Minnesota. I am here with the kids.
• Trying to figure out who is going to sell the house in this HORRIFIC market!
• Sucks to be a single parent.
• Training for a half-marathon too. That is coming up in 7 weeks.
• Took a trip with the kids to Minnesota for 5 days. Went to the Mall of America.
• Trying to get my resume done and applied for a Minnesota license for teaching.
• Looking at houses in MN...I am SO going to miss my house. I love my house.
• Going to parent conferences, leading parent conferences, decluttering my home.

I could go on and on. I will someday get back into the swing of it all. I will get back to reading yours too. I miss it all and think of things often. I am just blah with this whole thing.